HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
