And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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