i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
