My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
