he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
