Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
