So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
