since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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