What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
