hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
