The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Jerry, you need to find god
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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