I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
