he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
