well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
