you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
