bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize