You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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