Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
