haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
That reminds me...we need to get swords
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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