I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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