We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Randomize
