thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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