It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
