I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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