hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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