More tranny stories later!
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Houston, we have a blender
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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