Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I think my vagina is haunted
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
