Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
