living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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