when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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