Fuck appropriateness.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Randomize
