the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i think i have two assholes
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
