If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
