Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize