Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
