So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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