I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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