I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
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