All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
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