He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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