Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
