wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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