she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
