Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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