She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
