Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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