drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
