so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
