Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
