Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I fill condoms, not promises.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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