He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Randomize
